Changing your mindset: Learning to love to lose

[IDN101]

This may sound like a VERY strange proposition...

But, is it possible to learn to love losing. I don't mean so that you actually try to lose, but when you do lose- it has absolutely no negative emotional effect on you.

I have studies (in a personal capacity) hypnosis and NLP in the past. I understand the concepts of anchoring- the fact that you can attach (normally through direct contact with the sub-conscious) any emotion to a particular event / scenario.
I am trying to anchor the feelings of joy / satisfaction to losing.
My aim probably like most people) is to become unattached from my results, and concentrate on the correct play.
I feel I need to do this at the outset of my poker career; so it doesn't hinder the rest of my (poker) development.

Any thoughts, comments or feedback most welcome (even if it's just to say "Your Nuts!"

Regards,
Ian.
www.PokerPlan.net (http://www.PokerPlan.net)

[RiverTheNuts]

If you become addicted to loving to lose you will donk off chips in some masochistic, self-injuring type of cutting your financial wrists kind of way...

Indifferent, yes, loving to lose?? That makes you a loser..

I appreciate you trying to share your theories on tilt control though, as I still need these as well. My problem isnt getting angry about a bad beat, but panicked... I hate going backwards, and I do whatever it takes to get back to even, which usually results in catastrophic bankroll management

[Bang584]

I don't think you should learn to love losing.

Instead, you should learn to love making the right play. I got stacked yesterday reraising all-in preflop with KK and getting called by a fishy 34o. While it sucked to have my opponent make trips by the river, I still had a smile on my face because in my opinion, I just crushed somebody.

Oh yeah, I got it all back later. I was able to maintain a good mindset because I knew that I had outplayed the fish mathematically, and it wouldn't be long before the fish made another stack-sized mistake.

I find as long as I'm making "correct plays" (see Ace on the River), then I'm unaffected by any losses. And of course, there's nothing like a "perfect play" to really get my adrenaline going, win or lose.

[Stereolab]

You're looking for a different attitude or mindset to approach the invevitable downswings of poker, right? I think learning to love to lose is a potentially dangerous approach.

If you want to change you mentality then I'd learn to accept losses for what they are, losses. What causes losses is important. If it your play then you work on it, but if its just variance then the only thing you can do is accept them. To try and make too much out of variance is just nonsense. Maybe you're too results oriented?

If you want to change your mentality then I highly recommend Zen Buddhism. I'm currently learning it and I think its helped me out tremendously.

[Max Weinberg]

Don't learn to love losing.

Learn to love +EV and be indifferent about losing.

[ottsville]

I don't think learning to LOVE losing is quite the goal you want. I think striving for ACCEPTANCE of losing may be a better goal, after all, losing is part of the game and the only way to win is to lose occasionally.

[galahad_187]

[ QUOTE ]

Instead, you should learn to love making the right play.

[/ QUOTE ]

i was at this place fairly reciently - and because of my love for making the right play i would tilt so hard when i made a big mistake in a big pot with a not so big hand. I've tried with fairly good results becoming numb and indifferant to losing. However since i don't care if i lose i find myself not paying as close attention as i once was.

if i could just figure out a way to always bring my A-game i'd see you boys at the 2006 WSOP final table =] - then grow my winnings by playing 25/50 NL =\.

[tminus]

like anything else it's all a matter of perspective. IMO losing a hand is an opportunity to reflect and learn. with this in mind, losing money is the admission price to a higher level of play

[Tien]

Id rather have my money lost through suckouts because then I know I am doing something right.

Its a lot worse to gradually lose money overtime and not knowing what you are doing wrong. Meaning finding the leaks in your game.

[raze]

[ QUOTE ]
Don't learn to love losing.

Learn to love +EV and be indifferent about losing.

[/ QUOTE ]

That's right. Its all about losing pots in stride.

Also, taking bad beats is a very good thing. It means you've outplayed your opponent, and they caught their low percentage suckout. This just confirms you will take (and have taken) their money a ridiculously high percentage of the time aside from this beat.

[Wynton]

What is that old saw about gamblers? Something like, the only thing a gambler likes as much as winning is losing.

I'm pretty sure no one was recommending this attitude, though; just an observation that gamblers get a certain perverse thrill out of losing.

[LoosenUp]

[ QUOTE ]
I hate going backwards, and I do whatever it takes to get back to even, which usually results in catastrophic bankroll management

[/ QUOTE ]

man, been trying to control this for years.
-
not sold on the love to lose part. Maybe accept losing, ok, teach me the way. I'm not looking for a gratifying response from donking off 75 big bets in a session. I'm still trying to kick my compulsive masturbation habit because of this.

[tminus]

yeah, good point. it also sends me off researching the truth about variance