No respect for freeloaders?

[Speedlimits]

I am starting to have contempt for one of my good friends because he has been freeloading in life. If a person almost never works (ie. earns money) and consistently asks for car rides, food, "favors", should one tend to lose respect for them?

Also if this same person has benefited immensely from you, for example I have given this person the following things:

$500+computer
IPOD
Various clothes
Wallet
paid trips etc.
Not even mentioning the countless free rides,food.

Now all of this was done out of friendship for the person but I am beginning to realize that this "friendship" may have just been a ruse to take advantage of me. The catch is that I am not sure my friend has been "consciously" doing all of these things. My theory is that he has been conditioned his whole life to take advantage of people that it has become second nature, I don't think he realizes the magnitude of it.

My contempt for this person has reached an all time high though, mostly because I am jealous of certain things. He has an amazingly hot, LOYAL, smart and funny girlfriend. He goes to college and repeatedly takes advantage of all of his friends. He never pays for anything, his girlfriend will pay or one of his friends will. He lives with one of his friends and his dad FOR FREE. Yes for free. He doesn't pay a dime and EXPECTS not too. He gets free rides, free money from the government, and he has cheated on his girlfriend.

Yeah so basically I have contempt for people that have things that I feel don't deserve them. I am not going to sabotage his relationship with his girlfriend or friends but I am going to distance myself from him and stop doing him "favors". Would anyone else feel similar to the way I am feeling in this situation?

[CityFan]

Yes, let him go. People grow apart.

[bkholdem]

Don't be selfish, continue to give him whatever he expects. lol

[FortunaMaximus]

As a lifetime freeloader off a socialist system, the contempt is expected. And it's justified, even if the person in question is disabled in the eyes of said government.

So, what exactly do poker players contribute to the economy anyway? Hmm.

I surf and study on 2p2 heavily because I'm gonna have a family to feed, and will need the extra income. But FWIW, it's been years since I've taken anything that wasn't offered freely with the proviso that I realize that it's a gift and not to be expected.

Not every freeloader's insolent, lazy, exploitative. /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[madnak]

[ QUOTE ]
He has an amazingly LOYAL girlfriend.

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
He has cheated on his girlfriend.

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't respect him much either.

[madnak]

Ha, sorry, now I'm moralizing. I'm sure txag is proud of me.

Really, it sounds like he doesn't respect you, or the other people in his life. It sounds like he doesn't appreciate what you've done for him, that he takes you for granted, and that he doesn't much care about you.

It's possible I'm wrong.

I don't have a thing against freeloading, but I have a thing against treating friends as cash machines. Personally I probably wouldn't "dump" him, but I'd stop paying his way. If he wants nothing to do with me after that, good riddance.

[Speedlimits]

[ QUOTE ]
As a lifetime freeloader off a socialist system, the contempt is expected. And it's justified, even if the person in question is disabled in the eyes of said government.

So, what exactly do poker players contribute to the economy anyway? Hmm.

I surf and study on 2p2 heavily because I'm gonna have a family to feed, and will need the extra income. But FWIW, it's been years since I've taken anything that wasn't offered freely with the proviso that I realize that it's a gift and not to be expected.

Not every freeloader's insolent, lazy, exploitative. /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah I am not claiming I am some role model but at the same time I don't like seeing people get manipulated. All the "favors" that are done for him are because he preys on the other person's insecurities.

Example:(He has told me this specifically) He will pretend he is mad at his girlfriend over something so that he can ask for something/take advantage of that later on that day.

He has his girlfriends passwords on myspace/email etc and he reads all her emails. The same kid that will come over to my house and have me bring over 2 girls so he can get head on the couch. Yeah it's fcked up.

[madnak]

[ QUOTE ]
Example:(He has told me this specifically) He will pretend he is mad at his girlfriend over something so that he can ask for something/take advantage of that later on that day.

He has his girlfriends passwords on myspace/email etc and he reads all her emails. The same kid that will come over to my house and have me bring over 2 girls so he can get head on the couch. Yeah it's fcked up.

[/ QUOTE ]

I know I shouldn't form conclusions based on a single biased source, but...

I officially hate this guy's guts.

[FortunaMaximus]

Ugh. That's not a freeloader, that's a con artist.

[Speedlimits]

[ QUOTE ]
Ha, sorry, now I'm moralizing. I'm sure txag is proud of me.

Really, it sounds like he doesn't respect you, or the other people in his life. It sounds like he doesn't appreciate what you've done for him, that he takes you for granted, and that he doesn't much care about you.

It's possible I'm wrong.

I don't have a thing against freeloading, but I have a thing against treating friends as cash machines. Personally I probably wouldn't "dump" him, but I'd stop paying his way. If he wants nothing to do with me after that, good riddance.

[/ QUOTE ]

Does paying his way include "free rides." It's the little sh.it that kills me because it has a cumulative effect. He rarely ever pays gas money yet it takes me 10-15 mins each way.

As far as his girlfriend goes, yeah she is blinded by his little theatrics. Dude is a piece of work really. He actually has a different "voice" when he talks to girls. He talks all sweet and playful, then he will get off the phone and go back to his normal voice.

[Speedlimits]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Example:(He has told me this specifically) He will pretend he is mad at his girlfriend over something so that he can ask for something/take advantage of that later on that day.

He has his girlfriends passwords on myspace/email etc and he reads all her emails. The same kid that will come over to my house and have me bring over 2 girls so he can get head on the couch. Yeah it's fcked up.

[/ QUOTE ]

I know I shouldn't form conclusions based on a single biased source, but...

I officially hate this guy's guts.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah if I told you some of the stuff he did to my roommate I think you would want to kill him. Here is one example. He pissed in 3 of my roommates drinks (v8, sprite, blueberry juice) and my roommate drank his piss.

My roommate wasn't pleased.

The one decent thing for me though is that I am moving so I will not be geographically associated with him. My parents told me he was a con artist but I at the time he helped me get a lot of girls so I turned the other cheek. But now it's getting too ridiculous to keep quiet.

[soon2bepro]

hate the game not the player

sounds like you can learn a lot of stuff from this guy

if you already did, its probably time to move on

[Speedlimits]

[ QUOTE ]
hate the game not the player

sounds like you can learn a lot of stuff from this guy

if you already did, its probably time to move on

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah I've learned so much from him, hes taught me more than anyone. Even though I know I can learn more I think it would be better if we grew apart, mostly because he has a negative influence on me. That being said I can't say I wish I never met him because I wouldn't be nearly as advanced as I am now

[reb]

If he really is a good friend you should confront him with this stuff, although he sounds like a con-artist so it would be hard to take anything he says seriously :P

[valenzuela]

I say screw him.

[thylacine]

[ QUOTE ]
I am starting to have contempt for one of my good friends because he has been freeloading in life. If a person almost never works (ie. earns money) and consistently asks for car rides, food, "favors", should one tend to lose respect for them?

Also if this same person has benefited immensely from you, for example I have given this person the following things:

$500+computer
IPOD
Various clothes
Wallet
paid trips etc.
Not even mentioning the countless free rides,food.

Now all of this was done out of friendship for the person but I am beginning to realize that this "friendship" may have just been a ruse to take advantage of me. The catch is that I am not sure my friend has been "consciously" doing all of these things. My theory is that he has been conditioned his whole life to take advantage of people that it has become second nature, I don't think he realizes the magnitude of it.

My contempt for this person has reached an all time high though, mostly because I am jealous of certain things. He has an amazingly hot, LOYAL, smart and funny girlfriend. He goes to college and repeatedly takes advantage of all of his friends. He never pays for anything, his girlfriend will pay or one of his friends will. He lives with one of his friends and his dad FOR FREE. Yes for free. He doesn't pay a dime and EXPECTS not too. He gets free rides, free money from the government, and he has cheated on his girlfriend.

Yeah so basically I have contempt for people that have things that I feel don't deserve them. I am not going to sabotage his relationship with his girlfriend or friends but I am going to distance myself from him and stop doing him "favors". Would anyone else feel similar to the way I am feeling in this situation?

[/ QUOTE ]

Do a search on the following psychiatric conditions

Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Antisocial Personality Disorder (also Sociopathy/Psychopathy)
as well as other Personality Disorders

These have lists of "diagnostic criteria". See how closely, and to what extent, your so-called friend matches up to these lists. About one percent of people are Psychopaths. Check these topics out. You might get a real shock.

[Speedlimits]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I am starting to have contempt for one of my good friends because he has been freeloading in life. If a person almost never works (ie. earns money) and consistently asks for car rides, food, "favors", should one tend to lose respect for them?

Also if this same person has benefited immensely from you, for example I have given this person the following things:

$500+computer
IPOD
Various clothes
Wallet
paid trips etc.
Not even mentioning the countless free rides,food.

Now all of this was done out of friendship for the person but I am beginning to realize that this "friendship" may have just been a ruse to take advantage of me. The catch is that I am not sure my friend has been "consciously" doing all of these things. My theory is that he has been conditioned his whole life to take advantage of people that it has become second nature, I don't think he realizes the magnitude of it.

My contempt for this person has reached an all time high though, mostly because I am jealous of certain things. He has an amazingly hot, LOYAL, smart and funny girlfriend. He goes to college and repeatedly takes advantage of all of his friends. He never pays for anything, his girlfriend will pay or one of his friends will. He lives with one of his friends and his dad FOR FREE. Yes for free. He doesn't pay a dime and EXPECTS not too. He gets free rides, free money from the government, and he has cheated on his girlfriend.

Yeah so basically I have contempt for people that have things that I feel don't deserve them. I am not going to sabotage his relationship with his girlfriend or friends but I am going to distance myself from him and stop doing him "favors". Would anyone else feel similar to the way I am feeling in this situation?

[/ QUOTE ]

Do a search on the following psychiatric conditions

Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Antisocial Personality Disorder (also Sociopathy/Psychopathy)
as well as other Personality Disorders

These have lists of "diagnostic criteria". See how closely, and to what extent, your so-called friend matches up to these lists. About one percent of people are Psychopaths. Check these topics out. You might get a real shock.

[/ QUOTE ]

"Some sociologists believe that a sexually promiscuous psychopath who can live off others is a survivor and may represent one of many genes for survival in the human species"- www.crisiscounseling.com (http://www.crisiscounseling.com)

WOW. That sentence describes my friend perfectly.

He probably is a psychopath actually...I know when he was younger (I didn't know him then) he watched someone die in the street and had no emotion. Also when he was 10 or 11 he would capture stray cats and drown them in the bath tub.

He sas he's changed now but that urge could just be manifesting itself in a different form.

Thanks for the info

[madnak]

He's clearly willing to be very cruel to his girlfriend. But as for the cat-drowning, that's just about the major symptom of antisocial personality disorder. This guy's dangerous and ruthless. Just [censored] him. The likelihood he actually cares about you and your well-being is very small.

[thylacine]

[ QUOTE ]

He probably is a psychopath actually...I know when he was younger (I didn't know him then) he watched someone die in the street and had no emotion. Also when he was 10 or 11 he would capture stray cats and drown them in the bath tub.

He says he's changed now but that urge could just be manifesting itself in a different form.

Thanks for the info

[/ QUOTE ]

One major characteristic of psychopathy is pathological lying. Don't believe a word he says.

[Iconoclastic]

pics of the gf?

[bkholdem]

[ QUOTE ]
pics of the gf?

[/ QUOTE ]

secret video's of the couch head action?